According to Esquire ... A Man Should Be Able to do the following. Let's see how my man holds up.
1. Give advice that matters in one sentence. Check. He loves his verbosity but he can cut to the chase, especially when really needed.
2. Tell if someone is lying. I think so.
3. Take a photo. Check.
4. Score a baseball game. I would like to scratch this one off the list. It surely doesn't warrent the #4 spot.
5. Name a book that matters. Do books on tape count?
6. Know at least one musical group as well as is possible. Check. Hello the 80s.
7. Cook meat somewhere other than the grill. No, but the grilled meat more than makes up for this.
8. Not monopolize the conversation. Totally depends on the conversation - watches, boats, cars .. all bets are off. Otherwise, Check.
9. Write a letter. Check. Just get him pissed off about something and see what happens.
10. Buy a suit. Check. In that, he's smart enough to ask me to accompany him and pick it out for him.
11. Swim three different strokes. 2 outta 3 ain't bad for a boy who learned to swim when his dad threw him in the pool.
12. Show respect without being a suck-up. Check Check Check.
13. Throw a punch. I have confidence this would be a check need be.
14. Chop down a tree. Check.
15. Calculate square footage. Check +.
16. Tie a bow tie. Hmmm. Don't know. But I know he ties a damn nice tie knot.
17. Make one drink, in large batches, very well. CHECK CHECK CHECK! Pink fruity cosmo like beverages that taste like liquid sweettarts are my fav.
18. Speak a foreign language. Check - two actually, one better than the other as its truly his native tongue.
19. Approach a woman out of his league. He's not allowed to for I fear he'd find out that there aren't any.
20. Sew a button. Um, NO.
21. Argue with a European without getting xenophobic or insulting soccer. Probably, though the occasion hasn't arisen. He's more likely to be indifferent!
22. REMOVED because no one wants or NEEDS to know this much about my husband :)
23. Be loyal. Check to infinity.
24. Know his poison, without standing there, pondering like a dope. Check.
25. Drive an eightpenny nail into a treated two-by-four without thinking about it. Check.
26. Cast a fishing rod without shrieking or sighing or otherwise admitting defeat. Check.
27. Play gin with an old guy. No, but he's played cards with my mom, the shrewdest cardshark I know. So I give a check.
28. Play go fish with a kid. Check. Even if said kid cheats her pants off!
29. Understand quantum physics well enough that he can accept that a quarter might, at some point, pass straight through the table when dropped. Check.
30. Feign interest. Not so much a check...
31. Make a bed. Can and does are two different things!
32. Describe a glass of wine in one sentence without using the terms nutty, fruity, oaky, finish, or kick. Oh HELL NO and as his wife, I am 100% ok with that.
33. Hit a jump shot in pool. I don't believe this has been attempted.
34. Dress a wound. Check.
35. Jump-start a car (without any drama). Change a flat tire (safely). Change the oil (once). CHECK CHECK CHECK! He even had to tell one motorist that his battery was in his trunk ... he didn't believe him, but my car savant hubby was right. I was very impressed.
36. Make three different bets at a craps table. Check.
37. Shuffle a deck of cards. NOT Well!
38. Tell a joke. Needs work here too :)
39. Know when to split his cards in blackjack. Check.
40. Speak to an eight-year-old so he will hear. Does a 6 year old count? Then Check.
41. Speak to a waiter so he will hear. Check.
42. Talk to a dog so it will hear. CHECK, ruff.
43. Install: a disposal, an electronic thermostat, or a lighting fixture without asking for help. Just turn off the damned main. CHECK.
44. Ask for help. CHECK ... with my prodding "You should call Paul? (our everything mechanical savant).
45. Break another man's grip on his wrist. I am thinking Check.
46. Tell a woman's dress size. NO CHECK .. thank God!
47. Recite one poem from memory. Very DOUBTFUL.
48. Remove a stain. Yes. Check plus. We have two kids and a dog.
49. Say no. Check, unfortunately for me. Not often, but it does happen ... St. John 2008 for example. That would be a no. STJ 2009 YES!
50. Fry an egg sunny-side up. Check. Its me who can't do this one.
51. Build a campfire. Check.
52. Step into a job no one wants to do. Check.
53. Sometimes, kick some ass. CHECK.
54. Break up a fight. If the people involved mattered to him, Check. If not, he's no dummy.
55. Point to the north at any time. I am gonna go w/ a yes on this.
56. Create a play-list in which ten seemingly random songs provide a secret message to one person. Doubtful. Subtley is not his strong suit.
57. Explain what a light-year is. OMG YES, but please don't ask....
58. Avoid boredom. Check says the woman married to the man who always has a magazine with him.
59. Write a thank-you note. Check. Not often, but he could if he should.
60. Be brand loyal to at least one product. Check.
61. Cook bacon. CHECK! Perfectly everytime.
62. Hold a baby. Check, without hesitation and with true pleasure.
63. Deliver a eulogy. Untested, but probably.
64. Know that Christopher Columbus was a son of a bitch. Um, ok!
65-67. Throw a baseball over-hand with some snap. Throw a football with a tight spiral. Shoot a 12-foot jump shot reliably. Working on it!
68. Find his way out of the woods if lost. NO CHECK! He often can't find his way out of a parking lot. This is why God invented navigation systems.
69. Tie a knot. Check.
70. Shake hands. Absolute Check.
71. Iron a shirt. Check, though he'd prefer I do it, he won't directly ever ask me or assume I should.
72. Stock an emergency bag for the car. You mean the bugout bag ..Um, yes. Done.
73. Caress a woman's neck. Check.
74. Know some birds. Sure, some. . .does a duck count?
75. Negotiate a better price. CHECK. CHECK. CHECK! As a matter of fact we got into a bit of a tiff yesterday about this because I "TOOK THE FIRST PRICE, YOU NEVER TAKE THE FIRST OFFER!"
In short I would argue he's the perfect guy (remember I said guy, which means he is by no means perfect but as far as a guy goes pretty damn close). He knows what he knows, what he doesn't know he'll find out. He does as much as he can himself, but also has a keen sense of what is over his head and is more than willing to call in an expert. And he fully admitted his directional challenged-ness and bought a GPS. Dual Sinks and GPS - keys to any good marriage!
Friday, May 09, 2008
Wednesday, May 07, 2008
May Exhausts Me
For the record May is a busy month. This is why I usually try to plan a getaway in May. That way I can say "That trip is our present!"
MIL's bday
Ella's bday
My Anniversary (9 years and counting)
Mothers Day
The shared birthday of Mr. Flip-Flop and one of my BESTEST friends in the world, Barbo!
Birthday present suggestions VERY welcome here.
MIL's bday
Ella's bday
My Anniversary (9 years and counting)
Mothers Day
The shared birthday of Mr. Flip-Flop and one of my BESTEST friends in the world, Barbo!
Birthday present suggestions VERY welcome here.
The Boy: Month 15
He had a rash, which could have been a sign of a virus, so we got to forgo shots for that time being. Once the rash is completely gone, we'll go get more shots. Yay.
He is 33lbs (off the charts). 33 inches tall (95%). One pound per inch. That is a lot of baby for mama to love.
He is making mama worry because he's not that talkative. I have resigned myself to worrying forever. And he can say mama (usually when there is distress involved like daddy doing the bath wrong), dada (ALL too often), cacker (cracker), ah ah (like the sound you make when the dog does something you don't want her to), Ewwa (Ella) and Nuh-Nuh (this I am not sure if its no-no or night night as it usually comes out when I say "You wanna go night night?" He responds, "Nuh Nuh" so either that's a "YES night night please" or a "no-no". He doesn't say it all that emphatically and he doesn't fight bedtime so I am thinking its night night).
I can vividly remember Ella at about two starting to come to us when she was tired and saying, "NIGHT NIGHT. Niiiiiight niiiiiight!" Like put me to bed already you two dolts!
Though he doesn't really say much, he is a groaner. Uhhhh uhhhhhh uhhhhhh. He'll follow me around and I never can tell what exactly he wants ... attention, to be picked up, food, drink, a beer ... what? Talking would be helpful here. So i offer pretzels :) He is a vigorous nodder. So now he nods yes big time. So big time that occasionally momentum gets the better of him and backwards he topples.
All I can say is chunky or not, talking or not, I LOVE LOVE LOVE that boy. We are so lucky to have him and we try to remember that every day and every night. Even last night when he got his chubby little foot wedged in his crib slats and just could not pull it together for at least an hour after. I'd rock him, he'd drift off, then he'd rememember the pain and suffering and ramp up again. I felt bad for chuckling at him but it was not a serious career ending injury! He is a LOT like his dad.
Tuesday, May 06, 2008
Happy 6th Birthday my sweet toothless wonder...
This one is for Ella...
Happy 6th Birthday to my Ella,
You are the sweetest 6 year old I know. It is a true and absolute joy to be your mama. You are kind. You are inquisitive. You are smart enough to know words like insatiable and facetious. Your dad and I are just trying to keep up. You LOVE to talk and sometimes I think you'll never stop asking questions, then I remember that your curiosity is a wonderful thing.
You are almost finished with kindergarten and you have made new friends and amazing progress this year. From no writing to writing. From no reading to reading. You are open, loving, and friendly. And Smart. And all of this makes your parents supremely, almost obnoxiously, proud of you!
Love,
Mama and Daddy
PS we know you will be embarrassed to read this when you are approximately age 10-17, but hope that at 25 you'll realize how truly special and precious you and your childhood were to us!
You are the sweetest 6 year old I know. It is a true and absolute joy to be your mama. You are kind. You are inquisitive. You are smart enough to know words like insatiable and facetious. Your dad and I are just trying to keep up. You LOVE to talk and sometimes I think you'll never stop asking questions, then I remember that your curiosity is a wonderful thing.
You are almost finished with kindergarten and you have made new friends and amazing progress this year. From no writing to writing. From no reading to reading. You are open, loving, and friendly. And Smart. And all of this makes your parents supremely, almost obnoxiously, proud of you!
Love,
Mama and Daddy
PS we know you will be embarrassed to read this when you are approximately age 10-17, but hope that at 25 you'll realize how truly special and precious you and your childhood were to us!
Monday, May 05, 2008
Whew....
Though Ella's official 6th Birthday is not until tomorrow we had her party this weekend. The party was great! As usual we lucked out with PERFECT, beautiful weather. She always has the loveliest days for her parties. May is a great month to have a kid!
I prepared/bought way too much food as usual but since much of my family decided to stay over a night or three, we munched our way through the leftovers by the end of the weekend.
Ella had an absolute blast! Our guests were a perfect mix of her little friends and our family and grown-up friends. There was even a "project" that Maggie supervised and all of the little girls got to make themselves a bracelet. I tend to direct her away from the giant themed, you have to have 5 planned activities kind of party. I am a firm believer that kids do best and have the most fun when they are allowed to be kids. Still, the one project was a big hit with those from 3 - 14! Kept them occupied for a long time!
Max slept through most of the party waking up only in time for present opening.
Yesterday, I enlisted my godmother (who has a savant like knowledge of most things, but plantings and landscaping in particular) to help picking and planting some stuff. We picked a sky pencil shrub/tree that will grow to about 15-20 feet and some annuals. I also ordered a Crepe Murtle, a Poplar tree and a Viburnum (like lilacs, Viburnum, commonly known as snowball bushes, really remind me of my childhood) to add a bit of stuff to the expanse of yard that is SO naked. The poplar should give us from front side shade in ohhhhh 3-5 years or so that would be VERY nice! We (that would be the we that really is just the hubby) also removed a dead bush and trimmed back our rhododendron that decided to take over our walkway). We are trying to do a few things each season to get some kind of landscaping going. It is amazing how much of a difference a few new things and trimming up made!
It was a great weekend --- EXHAUSTING --- but great.
I prepared/bought way too much food as usual but since much of my family decided to stay over a night or three, we munched our way through the leftovers by the end of the weekend.
Ella had an absolute blast! Our guests were a perfect mix of her little friends and our family and grown-up friends. There was even a "project" that Maggie supervised and all of the little girls got to make themselves a bracelet. I tend to direct her away from the giant themed, you have to have 5 planned activities kind of party. I am a firm believer that kids do best and have the most fun when they are allowed to be kids. Still, the one project was a big hit with those from 3 - 14! Kept them occupied for a long time!
Max slept through most of the party waking up only in time for present opening.
Yesterday, I enlisted my godmother (who has a savant like knowledge of most things, but plantings and landscaping in particular) to help picking and planting some stuff. We picked a sky pencil shrub/tree that will grow to about 15-20 feet and some annuals. I also ordered a Crepe Murtle, a Poplar tree and a Viburnum (like lilacs, Viburnum, commonly known as snowball bushes, really remind me of my childhood) to add a bit of stuff to the expanse of yard that is SO naked. The poplar should give us from front side shade in ohhhhh 3-5 years or so that would be VERY nice! We (that would be the we that really is just the hubby) also removed a dead bush and trimmed back our rhododendron that decided to take over our walkway). We are trying to do a few things each season to get some kind of landscaping going. It is amazing how much of a difference a few new things and trimming up made!
It was a great weekend --- EXHAUSTING --- but great.
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
STJ 2009 Shortlist
With June 2009 only a mere 13+ months away, we are narrowing down our short list for the next trip. My TOP 3 houses to rent for now:
Casa Luna by far the most bang for the proverbial buck. And has the huge plus of being on the Coral Bay side of the Island. I have discovered we spend most of our time: 1) on the North Shore beaches, 2) in Coral Bay eating, and 3 ) Lounging at the house in the pool. This house delivers on all 3 points. It is not the most luxurious but it also is VERY reasonably priced, coming in at $1500-$2000 less than the other contenders when all is said and done.
Mostly I want something large enough to handle our crew - looking like 6 adults, maybe 1 or 2 teens and my 2 kids... This means a lot of living space, inside and out, a big pool, and decent bedrooms for all.
Mystic Ridge Also boasts a tempting North Shore location, 5 minutes from the beaches. Gorgeous house with great space for spreading out and lounging!
Villa Rendezvous Not my favorite location wise, but the bedrooms are beautiful and there is an actual lawn, a rarity in St. John.
Mostly I want something large enough to handle our crew - looking like 6 adults, maybe 1 or 2 teens and my 2 kids... This means a lot of living space, inside and out, a big pool, and decent bedrooms for all.
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Amazing Video
I understand the laws of nature and that it is rough in the wild. This is some of the most amazing video I have ever seen. The lesson don't mess with a buffalo calf.
It is a little hard to watch, but keep watching it gets REALLY interesting at about the 5:50-7 minute mark.
Wouldn't it be nice if this was the community reaction to child predators? Oh, really, you are going to mess with a little baby ... give me a sec, I'll be right back.
Watch it, you will gasp in a good way.
It is a little hard to watch, but keep watching it gets REALLY interesting at about the 5:50-7 minute mark.
Wouldn't it be nice if this was the community reaction to child predators? Oh, really, you are going to mess with a little baby ... give me a sec, I'll be right back.
Watch it, you will gasp in a good way.
Sunday, April 27, 2008
Report Card Time
The girl recently got her 3rd quarter report card. Kindergartners, at least in Fairfax County, are ranked from 1 - 5 in various areas of development, including language arts, reading, writing, and math. I am happy to report she's an all 4s, meets end of Kindergarten expectations (3/4s of the way through I might add), and 5s, exceeds kindergarten expectations, girl. At the midpoint we had a few 3s, basically meaning at that point she was on track to eventually meet the kindgergarten expectations. SHA! As if! Like she's average! In an area or two. I was happy to see all of those were now 4s or even 5s!
I was more than a little surprised that one of her 5s was in writing. I would have guessed math, but not writing as she is notoriously against it in concept. "You do it, mom!" She writes, but not really in a way most people would consider exceeding expectations but I guess in kindergarten these things are all relative. I don't recall learning anything other than my ABC's in kindergarten. Well, my ABC's and that one little boy in my class would have preferred to have been born a little girl.
I digress...
I am proud. Just for the record, she is not perfect. In the comments section, after what a pleasure she is to have in class and other glowing words, we have "Ella is very insightful (all me, baby) blah blah blah and Ella still struggles with her focus" (all dad)! The man can say what he wants but I know for a fact he is incapable of watching tv and putting on his shoes at the same time. And for the record, struggling with focus equates to her feeling like she couldn't care less about said topic and no I am not going to even pretend to be interested because I either already know how to do that or I don't care to ever know how to do that. Sound like anyone?
I was more than a little surprised that one of her 5s was in writing. I would have guessed math, but not writing as she is notoriously against it in concept. "You do it, mom!" She writes, but not really in a way most people would consider exceeding expectations but I guess in kindergarten these things are all relative. I don't recall learning anything other than my ABC's in kindergarten. Well, my ABC's and that one little boy in my class would have preferred to have been born a little girl.
I digress...
I am proud. Just for the record, she is not perfect. In the comments section, after what a pleasure she is to have in class and other glowing words, we have "Ella is very insightful (all me, baby) blah blah blah and Ella still struggles with her focus" (all dad)! The man can say what he wants but I know for a fact he is incapable of watching tv and putting on his shoes at the same time. And for the record, struggling with focus equates to her feeling like she couldn't care less about said topic and no I am not going to even pretend to be interested because I either already know how to do that or I don't care to ever know how to do that. Sound like anyone?
Grampa Nguyen
Today on the way home from lunch we detoured to visit Hung's dad's grave. We have stopped before and taken a moment to pay our respects. Ella has been with us a couple of times and though she never knew her grandfather, she takes the experience very seriously and always has an interesting question or two.
Today's questions included "Does Grampa love me even though he didn't meet me?" Of course he does. Next was "where do people go when they die?" to which we answered that no one really knows and that there are many different possibilities ... heaven for some, others believe their loved ones are all around us, others believe they will be reincarnated. She soaked all this in and asked, "Can grampa still hear me?" So, of course, I said yes.
Next, quietly from the backseat I hear, "Grampa, I love you. And ... Grampa ... why does it look like a soccer field here?"
Now, she is obsessed with the thought of coming back to life as something else. I suppose that makes her a hindi 1/2 caucasion 1/2 vietnamese girl. Her top pick is to come back as fraidy cat's mama.
Today's questions included "Does Grampa love me even though he didn't meet me?" Of course he does. Next was "where do people go when they die?" to which we answered that no one really knows and that there are many different possibilities ... heaven for some, others believe their loved ones are all around us, others believe they will be reincarnated. She soaked all this in and asked, "Can grampa still hear me?" So, of course, I said yes.
Next, quietly from the backseat I hear, "Grampa, I love you. And ... Grampa ... why does it look like a soccer field here?"
Now, she is obsessed with the thought of coming back to life as something else. I suppose that makes her a hindi 1/2 caucasion 1/2 vietnamese girl. Her top pick is to come back as fraidy cat's mama.
Friday, April 25, 2008
Hills
It is time for me to come out of the closet. I cast my primary ballot for Hillary. I know people have varying opinions of the two democratic contenders, but I voted for the candidate that was right for me. I've been reluctant to say much about either candidate because I have many friends who I admire, love and respect and know to be very thoughtful and intelligent people who feel strongly that Obama is the right candidate for them. I also know many Hillary supporters who almost seem shy or hesitant to admit it. I don't get that! So here goes ...
The campaign is getting me down. Let's face it, this country would be better off with EITHER candidate than it is now or has been for the last 8 years. Hell, McCain would be better!
I am realistic. I know in all likelihood Obama will get the nod. Unfortunately, I have a feeling McCain will destroy him in the election. The entire cycle will become about Obama's lack of experience (it's the war, stupid - a POW of war vs. well not much there) and the Rev. Wright bruhaha (even if McCain doesn't go after him directly for this, it will be a central issue - hello, can you say swift boat?).
I like Obama. I do. I think he is a good man. I just happen to think he is woefully underqualified at this point in his career. I also think the Rev. Wright explanation was not good enough. You don't sit in a church with a pastor like that for 20 years and then say, "a person chooses their church for many reasons." True, but should the primary reason not be the pastor? It doesn't ring true to me and I know that the republicans will exploit it. If I, a diehard Liberal (with a capital L) democrat, have doubts how does he have a chance with the soccer moms and swing blue collar workers that he MUST win? Personally, I feel there is a lot of show and no go.
I voted without any hesitation for Clinton in the primary and I hope I get the chance to vote for her in the general election. I know its probably a futile hope, but it is still alive. I think she is more equipped to fight and win against McCain. I think she is more experienced. I see that she has spent her lifetime working on issues that are important to me - children, medical care, social inequities. I look at her daughter and see, even with all the crap, an accomplished, well spoken, strong young woman. I could not, push come to shove, see a qualified woman in line with my beliefs on the ballot for the first time in my life and not vote for her. I am still mystified how her husband's failings have somehow become about her. I judge not. I have not walked in her shoes. But I do have faith that she would never intentionally harm this country, nor would she do so through ignorance or indifference.
In Maya Angelou's words:
"It may be easy to view Hillary Clinton through the narrow lens of those who would write her off or grind her down. Hillary sees us as we are, black and brown and white and yellow and pink and relishes our differences knowing that fundamentally we are all more alike than we are unalike. She is able to look through complexion and see community.She has endured great scrutiny, and still she dares greatly. Hillary Clinton will not give up on you, and all she asks is that you do not give up on her."
The campaign is getting me down. Let's face it, this country would be better off with EITHER candidate than it is now or has been for the last 8 years. Hell, McCain would be better!
I am realistic. I know in all likelihood Obama will get the nod. Unfortunately, I have a feeling McCain will destroy him in the election. The entire cycle will become about Obama's lack of experience (it's the war, stupid - a POW of war vs. well not much there) and the Rev. Wright bruhaha (even if McCain doesn't go after him directly for this, it will be a central issue - hello, can you say swift boat?).
I like Obama. I do. I think he is a good man. I just happen to think he is woefully underqualified at this point in his career. I also think the Rev. Wright explanation was not good enough. You don't sit in a church with a pastor like that for 20 years and then say, "a person chooses their church for many reasons." True, but should the primary reason not be the pastor? It doesn't ring true to me and I know that the republicans will exploit it. If I, a diehard Liberal (with a capital L) democrat, have doubts how does he have a chance with the soccer moms and swing blue collar workers that he MUST win? Personally, I feel there is a lot of show and no go.
I voted without any hesitation for Clinton in the primary and I hope I get the chance to vote for her in the general election. I know its probably a futile hope, but it is still alive. I think she is more equipped to fight and win against McCain. I think she is more experienced. I see that she has spent her lifetime working on issues that are important to me - children, medical care, social inequities. I look at her daughter and see, even with all the crap, an accomplished, well spoken, strong young woman. I could not, push come to shove, see a qualified woman in line with my beliefs on the ballot for the first time in my life and not vote for her. I am still mystified how her husband's failings have somehow become about her. I judge not. I have not walked in her shoes. But I do have faith that she would never intentionally harm this country, nor would she do so through ignorance or indifference.
In Maya Angelou's words:
"It may be easy to view Hillary Clinton through the narrow lens of those who would write her off or grind her down. Hillary sees us as we are, black and brown and white and yellow and pink and relishes our differences knowing that fundamentally we are all more alike than we are unalike. She is able to look through complexion and see community.She has endured great scrutiny, and still she dares greatly. Hillary Clinton will not give up on you, and all she asks is that you do not give up on her."
Medical Follow-up
I do not have the following:
What it could be:
- Mono
- Low iron count/anemia (they checked twice for good measure!)
- A thyroid condition
- Low B12 (???)
What it could be:
- Sleep apnea
- I am insane
- I have 2 kids under 6 and a full time job (I am not inclined to buy this one)
Monday, April 21, 2008
Lilacs
I am not a gardener. I do not have a green thumb. Not so much because I kill things, but more because I don't ever get around to planting anything to begin with. In my defense we did move into our current home 3 weeks before Ella was born and have been a wee bit busy ever since.
Except this Lilac bush. Lilacs remind me of growing up in the country and stopping on the way to my grandmothers to pick a bunch for her, wrapping them in wet paper towels and aluminum foil to keep the stems moist, sniffing them all the way down the dirt road to her house. I love the color, the smell, the dainty little flowers. This probably explains why the lilac bush is one of very few things I've gotten around to planting. It went in the ground in 2002, right before Ella was born and right after we moved in to our house.
The first few years we got nothing ... not a single bloom. Then for a couple of years, we got buds but maybe one or two bunches would bloom. Finally, this year, its gone CRAZY. Probably 50 bunches of blooms. This is it on its way to full bloom. The rest of those little dark purple blooms are now open.
I LOVE IT! To me this says Spring. I planted it right outside my office window for the sole purpose of being able to open the window and smell it while working!
Where did the weekend go?
At about 3 pm on Friday I could not stand it anymore and ditched work to go get Ella who, mono and all, was going to spend the weekend with gram. She was out of school Wednesday - Friday. Thank goodness for Uncles with full-time nannies, but no children at home! We were on the road by about 4 or so working our way to the half way point to meet gram. We had dinner at this little diner in Fredericksburg. Yummy BBQ chicken!
Saturday was spent running errands. To ensure we'd have plenty of energy we started with breakfast at Dunkin Donuts. Max really liked his bagel innards. Then off to the bike shop for some boy supplies and to Old Navy to return somethings that just weren't working for me.
After dropping the man and babe off at home, I headed back out to meet a girlfriend for coffee and to hand off some of Ella's now too small clothes and camping gear she needs for the Avon 2 day walk. Oh, how I wish I had the energy for a two day walk! I managed a little shopping too.
Saturday afternoon was so nice, and Max wasn't napping anyway, so we decided to hike down to our creek - I am always amazed at how much steeper the hill is than it seems! We had a great walk and Butter very much enjoyed her swim. I think we need to have stairs built down there! Neither of us could believe how quiet it was without Ella. Max grunts and babbles but there is no constant barrage of chatter and questions. She's not loud, she's just constant!
Satuday night we had a night out at the Palm with my friend KK and her hubby. Always yummy and very relaxing. They have great mojitos!
After such a busy and beautiful Satuday, Sunday with all its rainy glory would have been great except ... I was trapped either in the house or in the car with one or both kids all day. Hung had a charity volleyball tournament for a friend/former volleyball player who died a few years ago. Her husband organizes it so I really couldn't complain. I told him just to make sure to play on a crappy team so they'd be eliminated early. No such luck. They made it to the finals. Play started at 8:30am and he did not get home until 7:30 pm! Max and I just chilled in the morning and then we loaded up at his nap time to go fetch his sister. Met in the middle again and were home around 4. I was hoping (wishful thinking) Hung would be home by the time we got home. I was WIPED out.
Next up, I head off to the doc to get tested for Mono!
Saturday was spent running errands. To ensure we'd have plenty of energy we started with breakfast at Dunkin Donuts. Max really liked his bagel innards. Then off to the bike shop for some boy supplies and to Old Navy to return somethings that just weren't working for me.
After dropping the man and babe off at home, I headed back out to meet a girlfriend for coffee and to hand off some of Ella's now too small clothes and camping gear she needs for the Avon 2 day walk. Oh, how I wish I had the energy for a two day walk! I managed a little shopping too.
Saturday afternoon was so nice, and Max wasn't napping anyway, so we decided to hike down to our creek - I am always amazed at how much steeper the hill is than it seems! We had a great walk and Butter very much enjoyed her swim. I think we need to have stairs built down there! Neither of us could believe how quiet it was without Ella. Max grunts and babbles but there is no constant barrage of chatter and questions. She's not loud, she's just constant!
Satuday night we had a night out at the Palm with my friend KK and her hubby. Always yummy and very relaxing. They have great mojitos!
After such a busy and beautiful Satuday, Sunday with all its rainy glory would have been great except ... I was trapped either in the house or in the car with one or both kids all day. Hung had a charity volleyball tournament for a friend/former volleyball player who died a few years ago. Her husband organizes it so I really couldn't complain. I told him just to make sure to play on a crappy team so they'd be eliminated early. No such luck. They made it to the finals. Play started at 8:30am and he did not get home until 7:30 pm! Max and I just chilled in the morning and then we loaded up at his nap time to go fetch his sister. Met in the middle again and were home around 4. I was hoping (wishful thinking) Hung would be home by the time we got home. I was WIPED out.
Next up, I head off to the doc to get tested for Mono!
Thursday, April 17, 2008
MONO
First Pneumonia, now the girl has Mono. It all makes sense now. Really there is not much you can do about mono except lots of fluids, lots of rest and lots of waiting. The fever should be gone within a few days and then she can go back to school. Its been a week! As long as she's not smooching anyone or otherwise swapping spit, she is NOT contagious. Dr. G informed her that it is the "kissing disease" and we both want to know who she's been kissing!
Tonight before bed she came in to tell me good night and gave me a big hug and then gave me a mournful look before saying, "mama I am gonna miss kissing you!" As if we'll never smooch again.
As for me, I am not anemic and my sonogram today was largely (thank goodness) unremarkable. A few small cysts and a small fibroid. She even checked my kidneys! The tech at Ultrasound Associates was VERY nice to me and I could tell she was a bit on eggshells as my last visit didn't go well. I could tell she had reviewed my record when she coyly tried to pry without prying by asking, "how old is your youngest now?" For those needing a translation that was her way of finding out if Max survived what they called catastophic to me to my 18 week pregnant face. Not a good memory.
Now, I am thinking I might have mono ... hmmmmmmmmm. I am pretty convinced I have found the cause of hypocondria. Parenthood. I have always been responsible and on top of things, but I never considered myself a worrier before I had a kid. Now it seems like its all I do.
I do have an appointment with a regular doctor in about a week. I can't believe my girl has the kissin disease!
I will depart with one more Ella-ism from our car ride to the doctor today.
Her: Mama, what is the shell of an ant called again?
Me: Um, uh, mmm, I don't know
Her: Exoskeleton, right?
Yes, she was just testing me. She knew damn well what the answer was!
Added because so many people have asked:
Mononucleosis typically occurs the first time a person is infected with Epstein-Barr virus. Once a person is infected, the virus remains alive in the body for the rest of his or her life. After the initial infection, it rarely produces any kind of illness, but it can be transmitted to others. The initial infection with Epstein-Barr virus does not always cause mononucleosis. It often causes only a mild illness, like a cold, or no illness at all. Epstein-Barr virus permanently infects more than 90% of the people on Earth, but it causes mononucleosis only in a small minority of them.
Mononucleosis usually goes away on its own, and most treatment focuses on making the person more comfortable. Because there is no medical cure for mononucleosis, the basic treatment plan usually calls for getting plenty of rest and fluids and treating any uncomfortable symptoms. For example, cold drinks, frozen desserts and gargling with salt water can help to relieve minor sore throat pain. Ibuprofen (Advil, Motrin and others) or acetaminophen (Tylenol) can be taken to fight fever and body aches.
Tonight before bed she came in to tell me good night and gave me a big hug and then gave me a mournful look before saying, "mama I am gonna miss kissing you!" As if we'll never smooch again.
As for me, I am not anemic and my sonogram today was largely (thank goodness) unremarkable. A few small cysts and a small fibroid. She even checked my kidneys! The tech at Ultrasound Associates was VERY nice to me and I could tell she was a bit on eggshells as my last visit didn't go well. I could tell she had reviewed my record when she coyly tried to pry without prying by asking, "how old is your youngest now?" For those needing a translation that was her way of finding out if Max survived what they called catastophic to me to my 18 week pregnant face. Not a good memory.
Now, I am thinking I might have mono ... hmmmmmmmmm. I am pretty convinced I have found the cause of hypocondria. Parenthood. I have always been responsible and on top of things, but I never considered myself a worrier before I had a kid. Now it seems like its all I do.
I do have an appointment with a regular doctor in about a week. I can't believe my girl has the kissin disease!
I will depart with one more Ella-ism from our car ride to the doctor today.
Her: Mama, what is the shell of an ant called again?
Me: Um, uh, mmm, I don't know
Her: Exoskeleton, right?
Yes, she was just testing me. She knew damn well what the answer was!
Added because so many people have asked:
Mononucleosis typically occurs the first time a person is infected with Epstein-Barr virus. Once a person is infected, the virus remains alive in the body for the rest of his or her life. After the initial infection, it rarely produces any kind of illness, but it can be transmitted to others. The initial infection with Epstein-Barr virus does not always cause mononucleosis. It often causes only a mild illness, like a cold, or no illness at all. Epstein-Barr virus permanently infects more than 90% of the people on Earth, but it causes mononucleosis only in a small minority of them.
Mononucleosis usually goes away on its own, and most treatment focuses on making the person more comfortable. Because there is no medical cure for mononucleosis, the basic treatment plan usually calls for getting plenty of rest and fluids and treating any uncomfortable symptoms. For example, cold drinks, frozen desserts and gargling with salt water can help to relieve minor sore throat pain. Ibuprofen (Advil, Motrin and others) or acetaminophen (Tylenol) can be taken to fight fever and body aches.
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
iLove
Thing I don't like about my iPhone:

1. It is slippery. So slippery I threw it right over my shoulder the other day.
Things I love about my iPhone:
1. It is very durable (see 1. under thing I don't like).
2. My fancy case from fabrix cases (I have the black wallpaper design). It helps protect it when I toss it in my purse. Not so helpful when it is out of its case and it happens to fly over my shoulder.
3. Web surfing anywhere anytime.
4. Email live from 2 different mail accounts.
5. The camera takes decent pictures as long as everyone is still. Movement makes for blurring. This makes for lots of blurry pictures of Max.
6. All my music, email, pictures, calendar items synced and in one little slippery device.
7. It is pretty much idiot proof. Hey maybe that's what the i stands for!
A sample picture for your viewing pleasure:
My Turn
Just as I thought the kiddos had pulled it together Ella's aftercare called around 4:30 to say she was running a fever. This is day 6 (minus one day fever free) of fever for her. It is freaking me out a little. It is just a little too reminiscent of her bout with Kawasaki's when she was 2. If she still has a fever in the morning Dr. G wants to check her out. I took her to see the doctor on Friday, but couldn't get in with Dr. G (our friend) and was basically blown off by the doctor I did see. Not in a bad way, but in a "well there is a bug going around" kind of way. I don't blame the doc. She has no other symptoms. Still, its my Ella and I worry!
I have informed Daddy that being as I have taken 43.5 hours of sick leave since February 22 (11.25 hours of which were actually for me), he is on duty. He's fine with it and sure he had a job transition in there and all, but I need to work in the office doing work like things!
On a personal front, I finally pulled it together enough to get in to see my doctor today! I have been having issues pretty much for the last year. For all of our sakes, I won't go into a lot of detail, but I pretty much blamed them all on Max's birth and getting things back to normal. That was until I realized that he is almost 15 months old. It is probably time to stop blaming him!
Off I went to see my favorite doctor in the world. Yay, Dr. J-C! She checked me out and is suspicious that I have something called Adenomyosis. Basically its endometriosis of the uterine wall. 2 times more likely in women who have had a c-section of which I have had two. So am I 4 times as likely??? Who knows. Regardless, this could very well explain all of my symptoms. The one that is bothering me the most is fatigue. Since the new year I have been more tired more consistently than at any time in my life, including during the first trimesters of both pregnancies combined. Yes, I know I have a baby and a 5 year old and a job and a life, but seriously, I should not be this tired. Again, though I'd like to blame Max I really can't since he sleeps almost every night from 7ish pm to 7ish am. And has since he was about oh I don't know 8 weeks old!
Back to my point, this "condition" can also cause anemia (which I tend to be anyway) and anemia can cause you to be pretty damn tired. To be sure I had blood work done today and I will have a sonogram on Thursday. We'll see where we go from there. There are a couple of options, 1 surgical that actually seems like the best fit. Another is to go back on the pill. Don't want to do that. Don't need to do that. The third is minimally invasive but also involves pumping hormones into my bod, which after 15 years of doing that I am not too interested in doing again.
Bottom line is I am tired of being tired. I am tired of whining about being tired. I want to get back to normal. At least now I am dealing with it instead of just blowing it off. That's me --- extremely vigilant about the care of my family, not so much on top of things that pertain to me intimately!
I have informed Daddy that being as I have taken 43.5 hours of sick leave since February 22 (11.25 hours of which were actually for me), he is on duty. He's fine with it and sure he had a job transition in there and all, but I need to work in the office doing work like things!
On a personal front, I finally pulled it together enough to get in to see my doctor today! I have been having issues pretty much for the last year. For all of our sakes, I won't go into a lot of detail, but I pretty much blamed them all on Max's birth and getting things back to normal. That was until I realized that he is almost 15 months old. It is probably time to stop blaming him!
Off I went to see my favorite doctor in the world. Yay, Dr. J-C! She checked me out and is suspicious that I have something called Adenomyosis. Basically its endometriosis of the uterine wall. 2 times more likely in women who have had a c-section of which I have had two. So am I 4 times as likely??? Who knows. Regardless, this could very well explain all of my symptoms. The one that is bothering me the most is fatigue. Since the new year I have been more tired more consistently than at any time in my life, including during the first trimesters of both pregnancies combined. Yes, I know I have a baby and a 5 year old and a job and a life, but seriously, I should not be this tired. Again, though I'd like to blame Max I really can't since he sleeps almost every night from 7ish pm to 7ish am. And has since he was about oh I don't know 8 weeks old!
Back to my point, this "condition" can also cause anemia (which I tend to be anyway) and anemia can cause you to be pretty damn tired. To be sure I had blood work done today and I will have a sonogram on Thursday. We'll see where we go from there. There are a couple of options, 1 surgical that actually seems like the best fit. Another is to go back on the pill. Don't want to do that. Don't need to do that. The third is minimally invasive but also involves pumping hormones into my bod, which after 15 years of doing that I am not too interested in doing again.
Bottom line is I am tired of being tired. I am tired of whining about being tired. I want to get back to normal. At least now I am dealing with it instead of just blowing it off. That's me --- extremely vigilant about the care of my family, not so much on top of things that pertain to me intimately!
Friday, April 11, 2008
Sick Days
Got the call yesterday at about 10 am that Ella was not feeling well. Chills, complaining of pain in her legs, head and eyes. Her temperature at the time as 96.1. By the time I got there from work it was 101.7. Here we go again. It was less than a month ago that we were at Disney and she was down for the count with something viral. Because she was complaining about her throat I decided to take her to the doc as strep throat has been going around her school. Negative. The doc said she had seen 5 cases just yesterday with the same symptoms and it seems to be lasting about 3-5 days. YAY!
We had planned to take a 1/2 day today and load up the kids and head to gramma's. That will have to be postponed. She is very sad about that. The fever seems to subside with motrin but its come and gone 3 times now so I am never quite sure if its really gone or just temporarily under control because of meds. I will say we've always been a tylenol kind of family but motrin really works and works fast. Within 20 minutes of taking a dose she looks and feels considerably better.
She woke up at about 4am sweating and feeling like crap and was up until about 7 when she fell back asleep until about 9. She's not hungry, doesn't want to drink - I offered milk shakes, slurpees, popcicles, everything - no dice. She's just sipping water and resting with PBS. Thank goodness for all day childrens programming.
We had planned to take a 1/2 day today and load up the kids and head to gramma's. That will have to be postponed. She is very sad about that. The fever seems to subside with motrin but its come and gone 3 times now so I am never quite sure if its really gone or just temporarily under control because of meds. I will say we've always been a tylenol kind of family but motrin really works and works fast. Within 20 minutes of taking a dose she looks and feels considerably better.
She woke up at about 4am sweating and feeling like crap and was up until about 7 when she fell back asleep until about 9. She's not hungry, doesn't want to drink - I offered milk shakes, slurpees, popcicles, everything - no dice. She's just sipping water and resting with PBS. Thank goodness for all day childrens programming.
Monday, April 07, 2008
Summer Plans
I am beginning to realize I was delusional when I thought life would be easier and cheaper when Ella started school full-time. The daycare expense would go away and she'd be in all day kindergarten for goodness sake!
Well, not so much. We have decided that Ella will not be going to the same place she goes for Afterschool care for the summer! While fine for 1-1.5 hours a day, we are not so sure its fine for an entire summer. More importantly, it would offer no break for her from her routine really and that just seems boring!
This means I have been researching a myriad of Summer Camp options. They range from about $200 a week to well over $700! UNREAL. Now I am not one to short change a girl for a few bucks, but lets be real - its SUMMER CAMP not the Governor's School! And no, none are sleep away options (I checked)! These are all day camps, some of which require you to provide their lunch and snacks!
Anyway, it turns out the county runs some fairly good ones for a reasonable price. We will need to pack lunch but at least that way we know she'll eat!
The tentative plan:
June 23-July 3 Nature Camp
July 7 - July 18 Drama Camp
July 21 - August 1 Girls Sports Camp (includes swim lessons)
August 4-15 No clue!!! Anyone want to babysit!
August 18-22 Cyber Camp
August 23-31 Hopefully we'll be in the OBX
For the 2008/2009 school year, I am still trying to get her into the School based afterschool child care through the county. She's been on the waitlist since JANUARY of 2007!!! That's right 9 months before she started Kindergarten. She started at #63 and is now 16 months later #18! The program is supposed to be great but her school only has 30 slots. Maybe by the 3rd grade she'll get in. I should put Max on the list NOW!
Well, not so much. We have decided that Ella will not be going to the same place she goes for Afterschool care for the summer! While fine for 1-1.5 hours a day, we are not so sure its fine for an entire summer. More importantly, it would offer no break for her from her routine really and that just seems boring!
This means I have been researching a myriad of Summer Camp options. They range from about $200 a week to well over $700! UNREAL. Now I am not one to short change a girl for a few bucks, but lets be real - its SUMMER CAMP not the Governor's School! And no, none are sleep away options (I checked)! These are all day camps, some of which require you to provide their lunch and snacks!
Anyway, it turns out the county runs some fairly good ones for a reasonable price. We will need to pack lunch but at least that way we know she'll eat!
The tentative plan:
June 23-July 3 Nature Camp
July 7 - July 18 Drama Camp
July 21 - August 1 Girls Sports Camp (includes swim lessons)
August 4-15 No clue!!! Anyone want to babysit!
August 18-22 Cyber Camp
August 23-31 Hopefully we'll be in the OBX
For the 2008/2009 school year, I am still trying to get her into the School based afterschool child care through the county. She's been on the waitlist since JANUARY of 2007!!! That's right 9 months before she started Kindergarten. She started at #63 and is now 16 months later #18! The program is supposed to be great but her school only has 30 slots. Maybe by the 3rd grade she'll get in. I should put Max on the list NOW!
Friday, April 04, 2008
Slacker Mom
I think I should change the name of my blog from Flip-Flop Mom to Slacker Mom. I am on the DC Urban Mom's listserv and so I get lots of emails about kids and how to manage this thing called motherhood. Originally I joined because I thought I'd get some good insight and it is a good place of off load the baby stuff you no longer need. I have stayed because it has gotten just down right amusing. Typically it is pretty open-minded but people ask the wackiest questions to what is essentially a massive list of people they don't know. Do they not have friends with kids, or a mom, or a clue?
Anyway, when I had Ella I knew I would not be the typical mom. I am an overachiever in many ways and an underachiever in others, but in motherhood my goals were to 1) remain sane, 2) not end up divorced because I forgot I had a husband, 3) not end up with no friends because all I could do was talk about "the baby" and 4) raise a child who was smart, well adjusted and fun. Not necessarily in that order!
Anyone who knows me knows that I love my kids. Their needs are my priority. I am pretty vigilant about their health but only for good reason as both have had very, very, VERY strange health issues. So strange that I think I would be suspected of Munchhausen's by proxy if these strange ailments were not, you know, impossible to induce voluntarily. I digress.
So the latest uproar/vigorous discussion on the list has been about leaving your kid in your car unsupervised. We are not talking about for 2 hours while you go in the mall to shop when it is 90 degrees outside, but for 2 minutes while you run groceries inside or get the other kid into daycare, or pick up dry cleaning.
I am not catholic but for some reason I feel the urge to confess!
A mother that I know, who shall remain nameless has:
Left her daughter in the car at her daughter's request while running into Starbucks. Granted the kid was 5 at the time & the car was locked with no keys IN it. It was not hot and said daughter was fully visible through the window.
Left both of children (at different times) sleeping in their car seats in the garage after getting home from running an errand. My mama taught me one thing and it is you don't mess with a sleeping baby. The car, of course, was turned off to prevent accidental CO overdose!
And I even heard about this woman who thought her car was in park at the top of her driveway only to find out no not so much as it ROLLED down the hill into her own house, yes, with a baby in the car seat. Said baby slept through the entire episode, unharmed. This mother I know, on the other hand, had a nervous breakdown right there in the garage.
Oh and parents that I know have driven off only to have their child say from the back seat to them, "Um, guys ... no one buckled me!" (He thought she did it, she thought he did it)!
Did you know there is a law in Arlington that says you are not allowed to leave your child who is under 8 upstairs (or on any level of the house) when you are on another level? Seriously. The example is actually sited that you should not go to the basement to do laundry if your 8 or younger child is on the main floor. How about if the nursery is on the 2ND floor and the baby is napping, do you have to stay upstairs? Loony tunes I tell you.
I remember being 8 years old and being left at a pool with my brother and cousin (11 and 14 who would routinely try to drown aka dunk me until I couldn't breathe) with no lifeguard and rarely any other adults around. Today my mom would go to jail for that. I got off the bus by myself routinely in the 4Th grade because my brother had practice after school. There were NO car seats or seat belts for that matter in the back seats of cars. I remember sliding back and forth across the seat and sleeping in the wheel wells on long trips. I remember going off to play with my brother in the woods for HOURS on end totally unsupervised. I remember him getting lost in the woods in the snow because he followed our dog, who by the way, had no idea where she was going. (That could have been very tragic). We ate pancakes for dinner! Didn't have antibacterial gel and drank pool water. We watched TV and played cowboys and indians! How UN-PC of us!
I am not sure if the world has changed or if we have just become a nation of hypersensitive, hyper vigilant freaks. I am not stupid. I know the world can be a dangerous place, but isn't it dangerous as well to completely protect and insulate your children from opportunites to learn how to fend for themselves? Believe me, I would like to put them both in a bubble and never let them leave the house. Ella and I have had this conversation many times. Me: STOP GROWING UP! Her: But Mom I HAVE to grow up! I can't help but think that somehow taking care of myself after school, figuring out what to do when I was locked out, fending off torture from my brother and cousin, learning I could hold my own, was all fundamental to who I turned out to be. Strong and independent, self-reliant.
Anyway, when I had Ella I knew I would not be the typical mom. I am an overachiever in many ways and an underachiever in others, but in motherhood my goals were to 1) remain sane, 2) not end up divorced because I forgot I had a husband, 3) not end up with no friends because all I could do was talk about "the baby" and 4) raise a child who was smart, well adjusted and fun. Not necessarily in that order!
Anyone who knows me knows that I love my kids. Their needs are my priority. I am pretty vigilant about their health but only for good reason as both have had very, very, VERY strange health issues. So strange that I think I would be suspected of Munchhausen's by proxy if these strange ailments were not, you know, impossible to induce voluntarily. I digress.
So the latest uproar/vigorous discussion on the list has been about leaving your kid in your car unsupervised. We are not talking about for 2 hours while you go in the mall to shop when it is 90 degrees outside, but for 2 minutes while you run groceries inside or get the other kid into daycare, or pick up dry cleaning.
I am not catholic but for some reason I feel the urge to confess!
A mother that I know, who shall remain nameless has:
Left her daughter in the car at her daughter's request while running into Starbucks. Granted the kid was 5 at the time & the car was locked with no keys IN it. It was not hot and said daughter was fully visible through the window.
Left both of children (at different times) sleeping in their car seats in the garage after getting home from running an errand. My mama taught me one thing and it is you don't mess with a sleeping baby. The car, of course, was turned off to prevent accidental CO overdose!
And I even heard about this woman who thought her car was in park at the top of her driveway only to find out no not so much as it ROLLED down the hill into her own house, yes, with a baby in the car seat. Said baby slept through the entire episode, unharmed. This mother I know, on the other hand, had a nervous breakdown right there in the garage.
Oh and parents that I know have driven off only to have their child say from the back seat to them, "Um, guys ... no one buckled me!" (He thought she did it, she thought he did it)!
Did you know there is a law in Arlington that says you are not allowed to leave your child who is under 8 upstairs (or on any level of the house) when you are on another level? Seriously. The example is actually sited that you should not go to the basement to do laundry if your 8 or younger child is on the main floor. How about if the nursery is on the 2ND floor and the baby is napping, do you have to stay upstairs? Loony tunes I tell you.
I remember being 8 years old and being left at a pool with my brother and cousin (11 and 14 who would routinely try to drown aka dunk me until I couldn't breathe) with no lifeguard and rarely any other adults around. Today my mom would go to jail for that. I got off the bus by myself routinely in the 4Th grade because my brother had practice after school. There were NO car seats or seat belts for that matter in the back seats of cars. I remember sliding back and forth across the seat and sleeping in the wheel wells on long trips. I remember going off to play with my brother in the woods for HOURS on end totally unsupervised. I remember him getting lost in the woods in the snow because he followed our dog, who by the way, had no idea where she was going. (That could have been very tragic). We ate pancakes for dinner! Didn't have antibacterial gel and drank pool water. We watched TV and played cowboys and indians! How UN-PC of us!
I am not sure if the world has changed or if we have just become a nation of hypersensitive, hyper vigilant freaks. I am not stupid. I know the world can be a dangerous place, but isn't it dangerous as well to completely protect and insulate your children from opportunites to learn how to fend for themselves? Believe me, I would like to put them both in a bubble and never let them leave the house. Ella and I have had this conversation many times. Me: STOP GROWING UP! Her: But Mom I HAVE to grow up! I can't help but think that somehow taking care of myself after school, figuring out what to do when I was locked out, fending off torture from my brother and cousin, learning I could hold my own, was all fundamental to who I turned out to be. Strong and independent, self-reliant.
Wednesday, April 02, 2008
Friends
I had the pleasure of having dinner with one of my oldest and dearest friends tonight. This particular friend dates back to my 2nd year of college. Only my middle school & high school BFF, Jen, and my husband oh and my friend Meredith from freshman year predate her. When she mentioned that we've known each other for 15 years, I couldn't quite believe it. We met in a history class at W&M and formed a close friendship based on sharing crazy roommate stories. We had some doozies.
She started a new job recently and we hadn't managed to catch up in almost a year. Luckily she is one of those friends who whether its been 5 days or 5 months, you pick up exactly where you left off. We had a great dinner in Old Town on the water at Mai Thai. Our talk, our ability to just slip right back into familiar conversation got me thinking on the way home. I may not be one of those people who seems to collect a bunch of friends. Still, those I have seem to stick. I am pretty protective of my innermost self and thus my inner circle is tight and not easily penetrated.
I've known my oldest friend who really is more like a sister we know so much about one another in the 6th grade. We weren't close in 6th and 7th grade because there was a third friend who was sort of the queen bee who had a wedge in between us. Once we realized she was an idiot, we bonded and the rest as they say is history. Jen is the kind of friend who you just love. She always seemed more mature and responsible than most. We became really close in high school and though now our lives are so different and geographically we are not close, I still count her as one of my dearest friends. She's the one I would call in the middle of the night to come help me in a crisis. We were in each others weddings. She was there for the birth of my children and I was there for hers. Literally there, in the room! I almost didn't make it to her 2nd one (Ella was young, we'd been through the first one, work was busy). We had decided to wait until she was out of the hospital to go and visit, I just could NOT not go so at the last minute decided to rush to the hospital - 4 HOURS away! I made it just as they were inducing her. I can still remember the look on her face when I walked through the door and the tears that ran down her cheeks as she murmured something about mine being the face she most wanted to see. We are comforted and feel safe in each others presence. We each have two young kids and we live about 3 hours apart, so it is very hard to spend a lot of quality time together. However, I know there will come a time when our lives settle down and once again we will find time for each other.
Then there is Meredith. I met her freshman year and remember being blown away by how smart and informed she was, but also how humble and genuine. We remained friends all through college and though she is now in Indiana we routinely email and keep up with each others lives. We bond over familial issues that are scarily similar and our mutual disdain for the current administration! Oh and a love of cherry slurpees! I am so glad we never lost touch.
Barbo who I hired while still at W&M thinking wow she seems like a fun girl! Boy, I had no idea. I have never laughed as hard as I do with her. We've been friends since 1993 and we still hang out, travel together and "talk" via im and email all the time. We have been there for each other though a lot of crap and a lot of great times. She honored us by having Ella in her wedding. Her husband is amazing too!
Then there's KK. We met through a mutual friend of our husbands while I was still in graduate school (1997 I think) and we've since ditched him and formed our own friendship. Wow, its been 10 years! We see each other at a minimum every other week when we go indulge ourselves with cheap pedicures and dinner out. It is a routine we started in about 2001 I think. We are like clockwork. We meet, we talk about everything - life, other friends, work, the kids, husbands, politics - you name it and we've probably covered it. I think these nights are like my therapy. I relish the hours of just being a girl again, knowing my kids are home and tucked in bed, and being able to have a 2 hour uninterrupted conversation. We travel together, we hang out on the deck drinking too much wine, we laugh, we cry, we are stupid and we often get strange looks from our husbands but we don't care ;)
There is SumSumSummertime! A woman who is so much fun to know and such a caring, loving friend. I met her as well through a mutual friend who we have since kind of lost touch with but we kept each other. Funny how often that happens. Along with her came this wonderful strong circle of her friends who I am SO happy and lucky to have infiltrated. We claim to have a book club, though we don't seem to do a lot of reading! More likely you'll catch us with great noshes and cocktails just chatting up a storm!
The strange, or maybe not so strange, thing about these women that I love so much is that they are all so distinct and so different. There is no one personality type. They are all smart and quirky and genuinely who they are. If they have anything in common it would be their distinct lack of pretense and a genuineness in how they live their lives. They all have their priorities in order. They all have there moments of OMG I AM FREAKING out (me included). They all rally around when someone is in need. I know that I am extremely fortunate to know each of them! So this goes out to all my girlies. I am so happy you are all in my life!
She started a new job recently and we hadn't managed to catch up in almost a year. Luckily she is one of those friends who whether its been 5 days or 5 months, you pick up exactly where you left off. We had a great dinner in Old Town on the water at Mai Thai. Our talk, our ability to just slip right back into familiar conversation got me thinking on the way home. I may not be one of those people who seems to collect a bunch of friends. Still, those I have seem to stick. I am pretty protective of my innermost self and thus my inner circle is tight and not easily penetrated.
I've known my oldest friend who really is more like a sister we know so much about one another in the 6th grade. We weren't close in 6th and 7th grade because there was a third friend who was sort of the queen bee who had a wedge in between us. Once we realized she was an idiot, we bonded and the rest as they say is history. Jen is the kind of friend who you just love. She always seemed more mature and responsible than most. We became really close in high school and though now our lives are so different and geographically we are not close, I still count her as one of my dearest friends. She's the one I would call in the middle of the night to come help me in a crisis. We were in each others weddings. She was there for the birth of my children and I was there for hers. Literally there, in the room! I almost didn't make it to her 2nd one (Ella was young, we'd been through the first one, work was busy). We had decided to wait until she was out of the hospital to go and visit, I just could NOT not go so at the last minute decided to rush to the hospital - 4 HOURS away! I made it just as they were inducing her. I can still remember the look on her face when I walked through the door and the tears that ran down her cheeks as she murmured something about mine being the face she most wanted to see. We are comforted and feel safe in each others presence. We each have two young kids and we live about 3 hours apart, so it is very hard to spend a lot of quality time together. However, I know there will come a time when our lives settle down and once again we will find time for each other.
Then there is Meredith. I met her freshman year and remember being blown away by how smart and informed she was, but also how humble and genuine. We remained friends all through college and though she is now in Indiana we routinely email and keep up with each others lives. We bond over familial issues that are scarily similar and our mutual disdain for the current administration! Oh and a love of cherry slurpees! I am so glad we never lost touch.
Barbo who I hired while still at W&M thinking wow she seems like a fun girl! Boy, I had no idea. I have never laughed as hard as I do with her. We've been friends since 1993 and we still hang out, travel together and "talk" via im and email all the time. We have been there for each other though a lot of crap and a lot of great times. She honored us by having Ella in her wedding. Her husband is amazing too!
Then there's KK. We met through a mutual friend of our husbands while I was still in graduate school (1997 I think) and we've since ditched him and formed our own friendship. Wow, its been 10 years! We see each other at a minimum every other week when we go indulge ourselves with cheap pedicures and dinner out. It is a routine we started in about 2001 I think. We are like clockwork. We meet, we talk about everything - life, other friends, work, the kids, husbands, politics - you name it and we've probably covered it. I think these nights are like my therapy. I relish the hours of just being a girl again, knowing my kids are home and tucked in bed, and being able to have a 2 hour uninterrupted conversation. We travel together, we hang out on the deck drinking too much wine, we laugh, we cry, we are stupid and we often get strange looks from our husbands but we don't care ;)
There is SumSumSummertime! A woman who is so much fun to know and such a caring, loving friend. I met her as well through a mutual friend who we have since kind of lost touch with but we kept each other. Funny how often that happens. Along with her came this wonderful strong circle of her friends who I am SO happy and lucky to have infiltrated. We claim to have a book club, though we don't seem to do a lot of reading! More likely you'll catch us with great noshes and cocktails just chatting up a storm!
The strange, or maybe not so strange, thing about these women that I love so much is that they are all so distinct and so different. There is no one personality type. They are all smart and quirky and genuinely who they are. If they have anything in common it would be their distinct lack of pretense and a genuineness in how they live their lives. They all have their priorities in order. They all have there moments of OMG I AM FREAKING out (me included). They all rally around when someone is in need. I know that I am extremely fortunate to know each of them! So this goes out to all my girlies. I am so happy you are all in my life!
Monday, March 31, 2008
He's a Lover, Not a Fighter
We thought maybe it was just a coincidence, a lucky moment. That was until this weekend. If you ask him for a kiss you are 90% likely to get one. His favorite thing is going back and forth between his daddy and I giving us smooches. VERY sweet. Very cute. I think we'll keep him.
Also, he literally outgrew his shoes OVERNIGHT. Thursday night they fit. Friday morning I had a hard time getting those fat little feet in them. My Saturday it was hopeless. His $48 stride rites that we are forced to buy because his feet are so thick that only the extra wide (wide is not wide enough) will fit! SO he's on his 2nd pair of $48 stride rites. In a month! My gramma would be proud!
Friday, March 28, 2008
Back...mostly in one piece
Saturday, March 15, 2008
We're outta here...
Yellow cab is picking us up in 45 minutes and we are fully packed. 5 checked bags later! It is impossible to pack lightly with a baby involved. Oh well.
Our flight departs at 5pm, we will be in sunny Florida by 7:10 if all goes according to plan. It's not St. John, but its sunny and its NOT work.
Thursday, March 13, 2008
A Message From Max
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
3 Days...
Everyday after school I get a countdown ... 6 days till Spring Break, 5 days, 4 days ... today she says "3 days until Spring break" followed quickly by "What is Spring Break?" :) My ever so innocent girl.
AHHHHHHHH. That means I have to pack. And actually GO to Disney. Ugh. Sorry, but this is not the trip of my dreams. I am doing it because I am sure Ella will love and appreciate it and I truly do want her to have a magical experience. I just dread dealing with the screaming children and their parents en masse. I just do. Maybe that makes me a bad person, but at least I am honest.
The ONE huge highlight is I get to finally meet face to face a virtual friend with whom I have bonded over St. John and making fun of other people. She is the funnest person that I don't actually really know. I know, weird how connections are made in this web world, but I am very excited to meet her. We email almost daily and I feel like I know her, but still I am a little nervous & I hope she doesn't think I am a nut job. Wait...I am pretty sure she already knows I am a nut job but so is she, so I just hope we are similar nut jobs. I am truly looking forward to seeing her in real life.
On another note, I will not, for fear of totally jinxing myself, mention that one little boy that I happen to know quite well seems to be feeling better. I will not say that he has been sleeping well and having good days with full smiles!
AHHHHHHHH. That means I have to pack. And actually GO to Disney. Ugh. Sorry, but this is not the trip of my dreams. I am doing it because I am sure Ella will love and appreciate it and I truly do want her to have a magical experience. I just dread dealing with the screaming children and their parents en masse. I just do. Maybe that makes me a bad person, but at least I am honest.
The ONE huge highlight is I get to finally meet face to face a virtual friend with whom I have bonded over St. John and making fun of other people. She is the funnest person that I don't actually really know. I know, weird how connections are made in this web world, but I am very excited to meet her. We email almost daily and I feel like I know her, but still I am a little nervous & I hope she doesn't think I am a nut job. Wait...I am pretty sure she already knows I am a nut job but so is she, so I just hope we are similar nut jobs. I am truly looking forward to seeing her in real life.
On another note, I will not, for fear of totally jinxing myself, mention that one little boy that I happen to know quite well seems to be feeling better. I will not say that he has been sleeping well and having good days with full smiles!
Friday, March 07, 2008
Did I mention?
So he has a mild ear infection and a bad cold. Oh, and did I mention he is cutting 2 molars on bottom and 1 on top! FUN FUN FUN! So we are on antibiotics (and to think I had just said around his 1st birthday that he had only been on antibiotics once!) and tylenol. He was pretty good for the rest of the day. 3 hour nap, ate well, played well, smiled some! A welcome sight for his mama!
Thursday, March 06, 2008
A Rough Couple of Nights
Max, my little trooper & wonderful sleeper, has had a rough couple of nights. It started Monday night. He was very hard to settle and get to sleep. Usually even if he doesn't want to be in his crib (RARE), you can pick him up and he is instantly soothed. Always. Instantly. Bump the head? Pick me up. Soothed. Fall over? Pick me up. Soothed. Tired? Same thing. I don't think he has ever in his life cried inconsolably. Until Monday & Tuesday nights.
We finally got him settled Monday night though he woke and cried in the night. Also, extremely rare.
Then came last night. He had a great morning and a great day at Jeannies. Was happy at home. Had a nice dinner. Took his medicine and 20 minutes later we started heading south. It seemed like his stomach was bothering him. I suspect the Singulair. Top side effect is stomach pains. He cried and cried and cried from about 5:45 until 7:45. We called Dr. G at about 7 and he said to give him a 2nd dose of tylenol and give it 45 minutes. If he wasn't calmed in 45 minutes, we were to head to the ER. He continued to cry for about 30 more minutes before finally collapsing from exhaustion most likely and falling asleep. I was so rattled by the crying, and more likely the inability to help my normally placid little boy, that I was literally shaking by the time he fell asleep. He woke up this morning babbling and chipper as a jay bird!
We decided no more singulair. He got none tonight. He is fighting a cold as well, so he wasn't 100% himself but there wasn't any inconsolable crying.
I am usually not one to look at the medicine as a cause of any possible side effects. I know there could be a thousand things that caused his pain and suffering last night, but it just seems likely that it was the med. Hopefully, his wheezing will stay away and the weather and his health will hold until Spring!
Just listening to him cry for 2 hours shook me up, I can't imagine those parents who have to cope with a gravely ill and pained child. I just can't imagine the difficulty of dealing with that. And with that, I am grateful that my sweet boy seems to be doing just fine tonight. Tucked in and fast asleep.
For some reason it has me thinking about the lyrics of a song that I listened to over and over while I was pregnant, Chasing Cars. "I need your grace To remind me To find my own" So many lessons I have learned being the mom to this little one.
Tuesday, March 04, 2008
Friday, February 29, 2008
Max's 1 Year Check-up
We finally made it to the one year check-up. A little delayed due to ear infections, breathing issues, colds, etc. You see they like them to be as healthy as possible when they do all that they do at the 1 year check.
2 shots, 1 rectal temperature (he really didn't like that), a blood draw, weigh-in and measurements, and some tears we are pleased to report ... he's growing!
The Stats -
Height: 32 inches (90%)
Weight: 30 lbs (more than 90% --- ok off the chart but only barely)
Head: 19 1/4 inches (90%)
They like all of these things to track proportionately over time. They do. Yay Max. I was worried because he doesn't consistently respond to his name when called. Ok, I was freaked, as this is a marker for autism. There are a lot of markers and nothing else applied, but again, this is me and my Max so mama's mind goes crazy. So Dr. G says, "Max" and he turns on a dime and looks at him directly in the eye. I roll my eyes. Dr. G says, "Now you say it" so I say "Max" and after the 2nd time he turns and looks at me as if to say "What?" Dr. G says it seems like its a matter of compliance not nonrecognition of his name, in other words, when I usually say it if he's engrossed in something he's probably just ignoring me. SHOCKING, I know! My mind is temporarily at ease. Its one of those things where it could be one of two situations: 1) I am totally paranoid or 2) my intuition is telling me something is off. Each scenerio is equally likely, which makes it particularly challenging.
Max is laughing, babbling, telling Butter "ah ah" when she barks, repeating us when we say "mama" or "dada" and trying like hell to say "ella", he also calls most everything "Ga"! I think he's a genius. Oh, and he is totally WALKING! He's not 100% steady and he still chickens out from time to time but he can take 5-6 steps at a time.
Thursday, February 28, 2008
Updates
Sorry its been a while. We've been busy busy busy.
In no particular order here are the goings on:
1 - We are having the hardwood in our house refinished. We had decided to let it stay wrecked until Butter (the dog) died, but we realized she's still acting like she's about 2 and is unlikely to die anytime soon and that the floor finish in the first place wasn't the best and perhaps with a better, i.e. thicker, finish it might withstand the kids and dog at least for a little while. All in all I was tired of the floor looking like crap!
2 - We've been back and forth with Max to the doctor. I am not sure what's going on with him. He is on singulair and there are lots of reports of not so great side effects with it. Today we go back for his 1 year check-up (yes we are about a month late).
3 - Ella finished her swim class! Yay, Ella!
4 - The nephew comes home from College for "Spring" break this weekend. It will be nice to have him around. I need to stock the fridge.
5 - We head to disney 2 weeks from Saturday.
6 - We owed the Feds almost $1900 in taxes. Me thinks this has something to do with the w-2 from hubby's brother that had NO federal withholding! Thankfully we are getting over $1200 back from VA so a loss of around $600 and I could pay with Amex so...I get miles!
7 - Speaking of, Hung has changed jobs. He is now back working for his bro's company full-time, consulting for the gov't again. So far so good. He's back on the contact that he left about 18 months ago - apparently they've been asking for him to come back for about 6 months.
That's all folks!
In no particular order here are the goings on:
1 - We are having the hardwood in our house refinished. We had decided to let it stay wrecked until Butter (the dog) died, but we realized she's still acting like she's about 2 and is unlikely to die anytime soon and that the floor finish in the first place wasn't the best and perhaps with a better, i.e. thicker, finish it might withstand the kids and dog at least for a little while. All in all I was tired of the floor looking like crap!
2 - We've been back and forth with Max to the doctor. I am not sure what's going on with him. He is on singulair and there are lots of reports of not so great side effects with it. Today we go back for his 1 year check-up (yes we are about a month late).
3 - Ella finished her swim class! Yay, Ella!
4 - The nephew comes home from College for "Spring" break this weekend. It will be nice to have him around. I need to stock the fridge.
5 - We head to disney 2 weeks from Saturday.
6 - We owed the Feds almost $1900 in taxes. Me thinks this has something to do with the w-2 from hubby's brother that had NO federal withholding! Thankfully we are getting over $1200 back from VA so a loss of around $600 and I could pay with Amex so...I get miles!
7 - Speaking of, Hung has changed jobs. He is now back working for his bro's company full-time, consulting for the gov't again. So far so good. He's back on the contact that he left about 18 months ago - apparently they've been asking for him to come back for about 6 months.
That's all folks!
Friday, February 15, 2008
More on the W&M Flap
Over 300 faculty met yesterday to demand that BOV President, Michael Powell come and address the faculty and give more detail about the reasons for the firing (nonrenewal of contract) of College President, Nichols.
Nezlek, the Psych professor quoted, was the best professor I ever had and my senior thesis advisor. He was always a no BS kind of guy.
Nezlek, the Psych professor quoted, was the best professor I ever had and my senior thesis advisor. He was always a no BS kind of guy.
Ella's Version of Love
Me: "What do you think is an example of love?"
Ella: "When Daddy gets lots of extra gas to put in your car."
Me: "How do you know that Mommy and Daddy love you?"
Ella: "Because you tell me to eat healfy (healthy) and to eat lots of protein and because you want me to have meat on my bones. "
pause....
Ella: "Mama, what's meat on my bones?"
Ella: "When Daddy gets lots of extra gas to put in your car."
Me: "How do you know that Mommy and Daddy love you?"
Ella: "Because you tell me to eat healfy (healthy) and to eat lots of protein and because you want me to have meat on my bones. "
pause....
Ella: "Mama, what's meat on my bones?"
Thursday, February 14, 2008
Love
I thought this was an appropriate post for today! A group of professional people posed this question to a group of 4 to 8 year-olds, 'What does love mean?' My personal favorite is Karl's.
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'When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth.'
Billy - age 4?
'Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on shaving cologne and they go out and smell each other.'
Karl - age 5?
'Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs.'
Chrissy - age 6
'Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired of kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more. My Mommy and Daddy are like that. They look gross when they kiss'
Emily - age 8?
'Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it everyday.'
Noelle - age 7
'Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know each other so well.'
Tommy - age 6
"During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared. I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and smiling. He was the only one doing that. I wasn't scared anymore.'
Cindy - age 8?
'My mommy loves me more than anybody. You don't see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night.'
Clare - age 6?
'Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day.'
Mary Ann - age 4
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Happy Valentine's Day all!
My ever so sweet husband had flowers waiting for me YESTERDAY when I got home. He got a headstart, or he could have been confused and thought yesterday was Valentines Day :) He also had gone out and picked up the makings for dinner tonight: Steaks, lobster bisque, salad. We are going to have a sweet, romantical (yes, I made that word up) dinner after the kiddos are in bed, luckily they are both asleep by 8. Reminds me of the Valentine's day dinner we had in my dorm room in 1992, except the kiddos in bed part. To me, Love is knowing, really knowing, because we have seen the good, the bad and the ugly, that this man is not going anywhere. He is a rock. His love may be quiet and simple, but it is strong and unyielding. As hard and steadfast as his head! (I also happen to think Love is having a sense of humor!) Honestly, when he's around I feel like Cindy explained above except the part about him being my daddy.
Love is knowing you are the person who least annoys me in the world, and wearing that like a badge of honor. I am not easy. I am a good person, a great mom, I like to think a loving and good wife, but I have my moments. He turns the other cheek without being a wimp and letting me walk all over him. He knows when my gripes are legitimate and owns up to it. He also has this look that puts me in line when I need to be put in line. Thank you honey, for annoying me least of all!
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'When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth.'
Billy - age 4?
'Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on shaving cologne and they go out and smell each other.'
Karl - age 5?
'Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs.'
Chrissy - age 6
'Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired of kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more. My Mommy and Daddy are like that. They look gross when they kiss'
Emily - age 8?
'Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it everyday.'
Noelle - age 7
'Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know each other so well.'
Tommy - age 6
"During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared. I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and smiling. He was the only one doing that. I wasn't scared anymore.'
Cindy - age 8?
'My mommy loves me more than anybody. You don't see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night.'
Clare - age 6?
'Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day.'
Mary Ann - age 4
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Happy Valentine's Day all!
My ever so sweet husband had flowers waiting for me YESTERDAY when I got home. He got a headstart, or he could have been confused and thought yesterday was Valentines Day :) He also had gone out and picked up the makings for dinner tonight: Steaks, lobster bisque, salad. We are going to have a sweet, romantical (yes, I made that word up) dinner after the kiddos are in bed, luckily they are both asleep by 8. Reminds me of the Valentine's day dinner we had in my dorm room in 1992, except the kiddos in bed part. To me, Love is knowing, really knowing, because we have seen the good, the bad and the ugly, that this man is not going anywhere. He is a rock. His love may be quiet and simple, but it is strong and unyielding. As hard and steadfast as his head! (I also happen to think Love is having a sense of humor!) Honestly, when he's around I feel like Cindy explained above except the part about him being my daddy.
Love is knowing you are the person who least annoys me in the world, and wearing that like a badge of honor. I am not easy. I am a good person, a great mom, I like to think a loving and good wife, but I have my moments. He turns the other cheek without being a wimp and letting me walk all over him. He knows when my gripes are legitimate and owns up to it. He also has this look that puts me in line when I need to be put in line. Thank you honey, for annoying me least of all!
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
W&M
A sad day for William and Mary. Anyone who knows my husband and I know of our love of our alma mater. It is where we met, it is where we were taught to think and not just regurgitate, it is where our beliefs and values where challenged and where we went from children to adults. It was on that campus that we decided to marry. It is where someone like me from a tiny backward town and a boy who had come from a war torn foreign country at 2 both felt included, valued and wholly engaged in the community.
Yesterday the President, embroiled in controversy for the last year or so, resigned after being told his contract would not be renewed. In other words, he was fired. "He attributed the controversy surrounding his tenure to four presidential decisions — his decision to remove the Wren cross (more below), his refusal to ban the Sex Workers’ Art Show (a student council & women's studies sponsored event), his support of the College’s Gateway Program and his commitment to the College’s faculty diversity."
He has made some controversial decisions, not the least of which was the decision to remove the cross from the Wren Chapel, except upon the request of those using it. The logic was, ALL students attend events in the Chapel that are required by the college - the signing of the code of honor, for example - and that the space must be as inclusive as possible. Of course, religious groups and events using the Chapel could request the placement of the cross if they so desired. As a result of this decision, big money was pulled from endowments. Basically, he's a bit too liberal for the old guarde.
What disturbs me is that a small, handpicked board of visitors has the power and inclination to effectively fire the President of the institution for pissing off some well-healed donors. Yes, perhaps President Nichols should have treaded more lightly or been more open in the process of making and implementing the decision. Regardless, it troubles me greatly that the BOV has essentially fired him for pissing off big donors. Maybe I am niave, but I think the students and faculty (who by and large are outraged) and alumni should have some voice in the process.
Change is controversial and he was certainly trying to be an agent of change. I, personally, am going to have to think long and hard about my own financial commitments to William and Mary and weigh my support of the students and faculty against my desire to make a statement with my own meager dollars.
I think this faculty member said it best, "A prestigious university is supposed to be a bastion of inclusion and debate. How else do we learn other than by being challenged with different views? The BOV, under political and economic pressure, has decided to demote the academic and societal priorities of the College and voted to end the tenure of a College President who championed a diversity of views. A College President who welcomed the minority voice, even when they conflicted with his own personal views. This is a sad day, not only for William and Mary, but for the whole Commonwealth, as Virginia has shown it is a place of intolerance where centuries-old political will wins out over the education and betterment of our young citizens. William and Mary is a weaker institution than it was yesterday and I am shamed by the BOV’s decision."
Yesterday the President, embroiled in controversy for the last year or so, resigned after being told his contract would not be renewed. In other words, he was fired. "He attributed the controversy surrounding his tenure to four presidential decisions — his decision to remove the Wren cross (more below), his refusal to ban the Sex Workers’ Art Show (a student council & women's studies sponsored event), his support of the College’s Gateway Program and his commitment to the College’s faculty diversity."
He has made some controversial decisions, not the least of which was the decision to remove the cross from the Wren Chapel, except upon the request of those using it. The logic was, ALL students attend events in the Chapel that are required by the college - the signing of the code of honor, for example - and that the space must be as inclusive as possible. Of course, religious groups and events using the Chapel could request the placement of the cross if they so desired. As a result of this decision, big money was pulled from endowments. Basically, he's a bit too liberal for the old guarde.
What disturbs me is that a small, handpicked board of visitors has the power and inclination to effectively fire the President of the institution for pissing off some well-healed donors. Yes, perhaps President Nichols should have treaded more lightly or been more open in the process of making and implementing the decision. Regardless, it troubles me greatly that the BOV has essentially fired him for pissing off big donors. Maybe I am niave, but I think the students and faculty (who by and large are outraged) and alumni should have some voice in the process.
Change is controversial and he was certainly trying to be an agent of change. I, personally, am going to have to think long and hard about my own financial commitments to William and Mary and weigh my support of the students and faculty against my desire to make a statement with my own meager dollars.
I think this faculty member said it best, "A prestigious university is supposed to be a bastion of inclusion and debate. How else do we learn other than by being challenged with different views? The BOV, under political and economic pressure, has decided to demote the academic and societal priorities of the College and voted to end the tenure of a College President who championed a diversity of views. A College President who welcomed the minority voice, even when they conflicted with his own personal views. This is a sad day, not only for William and Mary, but for the whole Commonwealth, as Virginia has shown it is a place of intolerance where centuries-old political will wins out over the education and betterment of our young citizens. William and Mary is a weaker institution than it was yesterday and I am shamed by the BOV’s decision."
Tuesday, February 05, 2008
Illness!
The saga continues.
First, the good news: Ella is P-neumonia free! Yay, Ella. She really turned the corner and is feeling so much better. I didn't realize how run down she was (it was so gradual) until she started feeling better. 10000 mamas later, she's better.
Now, for the not so good news: Max officially has "baby asthma" BOO! This is not the same as real asthma. Dr. G says most babies outgrow it by the time they are 3-4. That is a good thing, but still in the short term it means when he gets a cold it often becomes a breathing issue. Wheezing, difficulty breathing. Nebulizer treatments began today and run through Thursday. On Thursday, Dr. G will take another listen and we will most likely be putting him on a "maintenance" medicine through the rest of the winter. We'll know more then.
For now, he's still a trooper. He can handle one thing at a time ... Tired, no problem. Sick, ok. Bored, alright. But in a combination he's over his edge. Which to me seems perfectly acceptable. I mean I know adults who melt down when they are tired. Much less TIRED & SICK! He is such a sweet boy.
Did I ever mention that I HATE winter? This is just one more reason.
First, the good news: Ella is P-neumonia free! Yay, Ella. She really turned the corner and is feeling so much better. I didn't realize how run down she was (it was so gradual) until she started feeling better. 10000 mamas later, she's better.
Now, for the not so good news: Max officially has "baby asthma" BOO! This is not the same as real asthma. Dr. G says most babies outgrow it by the time they are 3-4. That is a good thing, but still in the short term it means when he gets a cold it often becomes a breathing issue. Wheezing, difficulty breathing. Nebulizer treatments began today and run through Thursday. On Thursday, Dr. G will take another listen and we will most likely be putting him on a "maintenance" medicine through the rest of the winter. We'll know more then.
For now, he's still a trooper. He can handle one thing at a time ... Tired, no problem. Sick, ok. Bored, alright. But in a combination he's over his edge. Which to me seems perfectly acceptable. I mean I know adults who melt down when they are tired. Much less TIRED & SICK! He is such a sweet boy.
Did I ever mention that I HATE winter? This is just one more reason.
Friday, February 01, 2008
P-Neumonia!
So it turns out my little lovebug (Ella) has pneumonia. She's been complaining on and off for probably a good month that either 1) her head hurt, 2) her tummy hurt, 3) she's tooo tired. Usually these complaints come in conjunction with getting up and ready for school. SO I thought, she like me has an aversion to winter and just wants to hibernate. Actually, she said to me one day she thought that we should just hibernate like bears or move to St. John where it is always warm. I can't argue with her on either point!
Anyway, first she had a bug - threw up and basically feverish (about a month ago). Then she just seemed to have a cold. Runny nose this week, cough the next. The same thing that everyone around here seems to be fighting!
Well, we get two steps toward the bus stop yesterday and she says "Mama, my tummy hurts." Mama said Uncle! I was able to get in with Dr. G at 10:30 and upon looking at her he declared she's got a touch of pneumonia. BAD MAMA!
To look at her you would not have much of a clue and even he said she is a trooper. I just feel bad about the tummy ache she's had for a while now. She's home from school yesterday and today just to rest up. Rest really is the best medicine. Hopefully, she'll be back in the swing of things next week.
Anyway, first she had a bug - threw up and basically feverish (about a month ago). Then she just seemed to have a cold. Runny nose this week, cough the next. The same thing that everyone around here seems to be fighting!
Well, we get two steps toward the bus stop yesterday and she says "Mama, my tummy hurts." Mama said Uncle! I was able to get in with Dr. G at 10:30 and upon looking at her he declared she's got a touch of pneumonia. BAD MAMA!
To look at her you would not have much of a clue and even he said she is a trooper. I just feel bad about the tummy ache she's had for a while now. She's home from school yesterday and today just to rest up. Rest really is the best medicine. Hopefully, she'll be back in the swing of things next week.
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