Well, I haven't really blogged much (if at all) about it, but 4th grade got off to a rough start. At the end of the first quarter, our normally bubbly, sweet, inquisitive girl was just not herself. Noticing something was off, I touched base with her teacher, only to find out her teacher seemed to think Ella had a litany of issues. Let's just say my email folder dedicated to Ella's school work from K-4th grade has 137 emails in it. 90+ of those are from the 4th grade alone. Mostly mid-October through early December.
I knew from back to school night that we had a process oriented teacher on our hands. I thought to myself, this could go well or not so well at all. I hoped for the best. Well, the best was not to be. By the time I reached out to the teacher, we were seeing a real sadness and disconnect in Ella. She didn't want to go to school and mentioned that she felt like her teacher didn't think she was very smart. Well, being the mom I am, I immediately touched base with the teacher to find out what her perspective was. Well, in a nutshell, she thought Ella was "slow" ... no actually "verrrrrrry slow" ... um, ok. So 7-8 weeks into the school year, Ella was having serious issues and no one had bothered to contact me. This kid who is off the charts on her test scores, in the advanced academic program, etc, etc...is now slow. And ya didn't think to pick up the phone or send a note home.
I immediately requested an in-person meeting, just to have my worst fears confirmed and compounded. Advanced academics (AAP) --- "well, I am not sending her to those sessions because she would fall behind in her language arts." Me: "So what are they studying in Language Arts?" Her: "Well, they WILL learn their cursive this year." So you are telling me you are holding back this kid from what is stimulating to her to learn cursive and you are telling me she seems disconnected, slow and unstimulated. Hum. Shocking. Oh and by the way, removing a kid in the Fairfax County system from AAP once they have been screened into the program, so completely NOT allowed. It is very difficult to get in and once you are in, you are in for good. Think of the unconscious message Ella was receiving when the other kids her teacher deemed worthy were leaving class multiple times a week for AAP and she was not.
Anyway, long story short, Amy went on the warpath. You know that saying about the squeaky wheel? Well, it turns out, that it is totally true. Several meetings, much documentation and research, and some very clear guidelines and expectations (OF THE TEACHER and the SCHOOL as well as of Ella) later...things amazingly enough improved. Ella's demeanor improved, the teacher began to recognize some of Ella's strengths, AAP resumed, and low and behold her grades went straight back up to where they should have been all along.
Here's the take-away. You are your child's best advocate. No one else will lobby on their behalf. It was difficult for me, in a way, because I do not want to be disliked, I do not want to make a scene or cause a stir. However, in this case, it was absolutely necessary. I think this was one of those defining moments in Ella's life that she will forever remember. She was being wronged, in one of the most serious of ways. Treated as if she were damaged and unintelligent. That is something that just will never happen on my watch.
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